American singer Lady Gaga opened up about past pregnancy after sexual assault during the first episode of Oprah Winfrey and Prince Harry's new Apple TV+ mental health series, launched on Friday.
Gaga appeared on the premiere episode of Winfrey and Prince Harry's new Apple TV+ docuseries, The Me You Can't See. The episode focuses on conversations about mental health with experts and various public figures.
During her episode, Gaga opens up about the aftermath of being raped.
"I was 19 years old, and I was working in the business, and a producer said to me, 'Take your clothes off,'" Gaga recalled through tears in the episode.
"And I said no. And I left, and they told me they were going to burn all of my music. And they didn't stop. They didn't stop asking me, and I just froze and I just — I don't even remember."
Gaga said she respects the survivors who do publicly reveal their attackers; however, she has decided not to name her abuser because she does "not ever want to face that person again."
Furthermore, Gaga went on to mention the time when she went to a hospital to seek help for pain and numbness she was experiencing.
"First I felt full-on pain, then I went numb," the singer said. "And then I was sick for weeks and weeks and weeks and weeks after, and I realized that it was the same pain that I felt when the person who raped me dropped me off pregnant on a corner at my parents' house because I was vomiting and sick. Because I'd been being abused. I was locked away in a studio for months."
The Grammy award-winning songstress revealed that she became a different person due to the pain she suffered through, which led to a "psychotic break."
"The way that I feel when I feel pain was how I felt after I was raped. I've had so many MRIs and scans where they don't find nothing," she said.
In addition, the "Million Reasons" crooner admitted that she has self-harmed recently, stressing that it's not good as it makes you feel worse.
"You think you're gonna feel better 'cause you're showing somebody, 'Hey, look, I'm in pain.' It doesn't help. I always tell people, 'Tell somebody, don't show somebody.' "
She pointed out that recovery is an ongoing process, sharing some words of wisdom for fans who could currently be suffering. The singer stated that it is crucial to find "one person who validates you."
"Everybody thinks [healing] is a straight line, that it's just like every other virus. That you get sick and then you get cured. But it's not like that, it's just not like that."
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