Mothers! Bear Terrible 'Twos', Let Them Socialize at 3

CAIRO, Nov. 5 (SEE) – Most Mothers experience difficulties in dealing with their young kids. Tensions are almost prevailing. Seldom do mothers be careful not to shout at their kids and maintain their calmness. Though knowing that shouting won’t solve problems but also contribute negatively in the kid’s behavior later on, but still mothers cannot figure out a way that suits both of them; her nerves and her kids.

Have you ever been through this situation before? Have you ever wondered how to discipline your kid while keeping your nerves low? Well, ‘SEE’ quoted experts about what to do specifically about this.

It all starts with understanding where your child falls on the developmental spectrum.

At 18 months kids are curious, fearless, impulsive, mobile, and clueless about the consequences of their actions -- a recipe for trouble.

"My image of an 18-month-old is a child who's running down the hall away from his mother but looking over his shoulder to see if she's there and then running some more," says William Coleman, MD, professor of pediatrics at the Center for Development and Learning at the University of North Carolina Medical School, in Chapel Hill.

"Though he's building a vocabulary and can follow simple instructions, he can't effectively communicate his needs or understand lengthy reprimands. He may bite or hit to register his displeasure -- or to get your attention.

Consequences of misbehavior must be immediate. Indeed, if you wait even 10 minutes to react, he won't remember what he did wrong or tie his action to the consequence, says Linda Pearson, a Denver-based psychiatric nurse practitioner.

At age 2 your kids are using their developing motor skills to test limits, by running, jumping, throwing, and climbing. They are speaking few words at a time, they become frustrated when they can't get their point across.

They are also self-centered and don't like to share. "People call it the terrible twos, but it's really the 'autonomous twos,'" Dr. Coleman says.

Consequences should be swift, as a 2-year-old is unable to grasp time. But since they still lack impulse control, give them another chance soon after the incident, says Claire Lerner, LCSW, director of parenting resources with Zero to Three, a nationwide nonprofit promoting the healthy development of babies and toddlers.

At age 3 your child is now a chatterbox; they are using language to argue their point of view. Since they love to be with other children and have boundless energy, they may have a tough time playing quietly at home.

"Taking 3-year-old kids to a gym or karate class will give them the social contact they crave and let them release energy," says Harvey Karp, MD, an assistant professor of pediatrics at the University of California-Los Angeles Medical School.

"At this age, kids need that as much as they need affection and food." They also know right from wrong, understand cause and effect, and retain information for several hours. Consequences can be delayed for maximum impact, and explanations can be more detailed.

For example, if a kid hurls Cheerios at his sister, remind him about the no-food-throwing rule and explain that if he does it again, he won't get to watch his favorite cartoon for example. If he continues to throw food, take it away from him. When he asks to watch TV, say, "Remember when Mommy told you not to throw cereal -- and you did anyway? Well, Mommy said the consequence is no TV today."