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Editor in Chief Mohamed Wadie

Discipline Your Little.. Here’s the way


Tue 06 Nov 2018 | 05:24 PM
Yassmine Elsayed

CAIRO, Nov. 6 (SEE) – By nature and reality, mothers are involved more in raising the kids especially at the early years after birth.

Though their young age and small body, but discipline your little has never been an easy job. Many lose their temper and many more try hardly to stay in control for not causing any negative effect on the long term for their little ones.

In this article ‘SEE’ quotes what experts make from that and their advises to moms but also dads in this regard.

In a precious article on babycenter.com, experts consider that parenting can feel like a tightrope act sometimes. When should you discipline your toddler and when should you be laid back? To help your kid grow up to be caring and considerate towards others, it's best to aim for a comfortable middle ground.

Right from the start, teach your children that your family is a support system where everyone pitches in. Even a baby can learn to "help" you lift him by stretching out his arms.

Listen to and respect each other. Set a good example early on. A child learns by example and from the models he sees around him. When your child tries to tell you something, stop what you're doing, focus your attention, and listen. Expect the same from him in return.

Consistency is key. Hold firm to the rules and boundaries you set. Being calm, firm, and consistent teaches your child that you care enough about him to expect responsible behavior.

Toddlers feel more secure if you stick to the limits you set, even if they complain at the time.

Life's not always fair. It's natural to worry about disappointing or upsetting our children. But if a child never feels frustrated, sad, or disappointed, they won't develop the psychological skills they need to cope with everyday life.

 

Eight parenting tactics

These tactics aren't guaranteed to work every time, and not all of them will be right for every parent and child. However, they may give you some options.

 

Tactic one: lavish love

By giving your child as much love and attention as possible now, you're helping him to become well-adjusted and well-behaved. It's important that your child learns to trust you, and he does that by knowing that you're there to meet his needs.

That trust means that, in the long run, your child will feel more secure and less anxious. He'll have confidence in you when it's time to set boundaries and lay down rules, and he'll understand that you love him even when you correct him.

Tactic two: Remove and substitute

You don't have to stand by while your child does something you don't like. And you definitely don't want to stand by if your little one's reaching for something dangerous. Take the object away or physically move your toddler from it. Then give him a safe alternative.

Make sure you explain what you're doing to your child, even if he's too young to really understand. You're teaching him an important lesson: that certain behavior isn't acceptable.

Tactic three: put wrong things right together

At some point your child starts to understand what he's not supposed to, often around his first birthday.

When he looks at you with that glint in his eye and then drops his food for example, you know it's time to do something. That something is to start teaching him about taking responsibility for his actions.

Tactic four: focus on the positive

Tell your child when you like the way he's behaving, rather than speaking up only when he's doing something wrong. You may have to work at getting in the habit of rewarding good behaviour rather than punishing bad, but it's well worth it.

If we ignore children when they are behaving well and only respond when they misbehave, we teach them that this is how they get our attention. Remember the phrase, "Catch them being good!"

Tactic five: ask for your child's help

Your child's behavior is shaped by the attention you give it. If you reinforce the times when your child is helpful and co-operative, he is more likely to want to repeat that behavior.

As soon as he's old enough, involve your child in daily tasks around the house so he learns that everybody works together. Whether it's washing vegetables or sorting washing, mucking in will teach your child to be helpful.

Tactic six: manage anger

Tantrums are really about anger management. They happen when toddlers don't get their own way and this makes them feel angry and frustrated.

The first step is to find out why the tantrum is happening. Your child may be tired or hungry, or frustrated or jealous, perhaps of another child. He may need your time, attention, and love, even if he's not being very lovable.

The next step is to let your child calm down in whichever way works best for him. If he'll let you hold him, hug and rock him until he's quiet. If touching him only sets him off again, give him space to calm down by himself. This approach usually works when your child is more upset than angry and when you also need time to calm down.

Once he is calm, he will be in a much better state to fix any mistakes that were made and accept any consequences. When he is ready, replay the tape and return to the scene of the crime. It's time to fix whatever mistakes were made.

Tactic seven: speak your toddler's language

Keep communication really simple. Use short phrases with lots of repetition, plus gestures and facial expressions to show your child that you understand what's going on in his head. Saying to your child, "I can see that you're angry," not only shows him that you are trying to understand, but also expands his emotional vocabulary.

Tactic eight: listen to "no"

"No" is one of the first words many toddlers learn to say, and it almost immediately becomes the one they say most often. As parents know, the constant refusals can get tiresome. To help you cope, try to pick your battles.

Strange as it may sound, one way to prevent these endless "nos" is to sometimes take "no" seriously when your child says it. After all, we all tend to repeat ourselves when we don't think anyone is listening.

Of course some things are non-negotiable, such as being in the buggy near busy roads, or having a dirty nappy changed. In these cases, your toddlers "nos" won't carry weight. But try to limit the demands you make of your child to the essentials.